Well this page is for you, then, it really is:
And, remember, if you do have one of these most common fears, do you realise that:
"Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we learned here" ?
That's what Marianne Williamson says, and isn't it a chastening thought. Perhaps. Or perhaps it's a thought that basically says, "fear is made up so don't bother about fears!". Anyway, time for those fears...
This list of fears below, listed in order, is based on the search engine keyword research1 used to help create SelfHelpCollective.com; i.e. it's based on data taken from Google (and other popular search engines) and indicates the types of fear people are most looking for information on.
So it's not as 'scientific' as a Gallop poll (see below), I agree, but nevertheless this short-list of most common fears does reflect the level of concern that millions of men and women have right now.
So... (in some particular order)
1. FEAR OF FLYING
Flying is statistically meant to be the safest form of travelling, and yet here's this fear rated at number #1.
I guess on those few times that planes crash and people die it makes the news, and thus these fears are further fuelled. I guess, too, that you feel more in control whilst driving your car, so fear of driving is much less common even though you are far more likely to die driving to the airport than on the flight itself. Apparently. But maybe fear of confined spaces is an issue here, as is fear of heights.
Do I suffer from this fear? Yes, but only mildly. I don't enjoy flying - it is the dullest, least comfortable form of travel, to me - but I just try to distract myself with conversation, a movie or some 'yummy' airline food! (Not all at the same time, obviously!)
Now this fear is much more understandable to me. This must be one of most people's deepest fears - even those who are expert public speakers (like US President Barack Obama) get nervous beforehand, I'm sure.
This fear is all about everybody taking notice of you, and listening to what YOU have to say.
This is all about not fluffing your lines.
And... this is all about something that many people fear because they just don't do it often enough.
So even though this fear is common - perhaps our greatest fear? - I am confident that the rallying cry of feel the fear and do it anyway, together with learning how to speak in public, is enough to overcome fear of public speaking.
3. FEAR OF HEIGHTS
As I jokingly say on my most common fears page, my fear of heights is really my fear of jumping (or maybe it's my fear of landing)! But then I probably only suffer a mild form of acrophobia - I certainly don't suffer from any nasty physical symptoms. And, really, my fear of heights is the same fear as my fear of jumping in front of an oncoming train (or lorry)...
(Is this just me, or do you suffer from a similar fear? Let me know!)
Anyway, clearly fear of heights is very common and one of the top 10 fears. So how to overcome fear of heights? Well, maybe this YouTube video will help...
4. FEAR OF THE DARK
This is a fear that stems from childhood, I think, but it may last well into adulthood. This is one of the most 'irrational' of the top 10 fears and needs to be faced up to, one way or another (especially if you are an adult).
And overcoming fear of darkness starts with trying to understand what this fear is really all about. That is, answering the question, "What is it about the dark that frightens you?"
This top 10 fear is summed up, beautifully, by this expression: "Into me, see". And I guess some of us (not just men, either) don't like the idea of people seeing into them. I think other fears - fear of rejection, fear of commitment, fear of failure - come into play, too. It's a fear of change, also. And change can be scary for all of us, at times!
Like most fears, having fear of intimacy limits us as individual human beings!
Use self-hypnosis to reprogram your mind, and overcome these fears & phobias! Check out Hypnosis Downloads' Fears & Phobias page.
Top 10 Fears 6. FEAR OF DEATH
Thanotophobia affects many millions around the world. It's not just about the fear of death, but the fear of dead things, or anything death-related.
Overcoming this fear is about understanding that life is a cycle that includes death (they're two sides of the same coin); it's knowing that people will not forget you; it's about being open to having this fear in the first place (perhaps by talking to a professional or to a friend).
This is another understandable item in the list of most common fears. Even 'successful' people suffer from this fear, I'm sure. And I think it fuels many of the other top 10 fears.
Again, this is fear of change and fear of what other people will think of you (fear of rejection?). And, as with overcoming most common fears, it's all about facing the fear by taking action.
Okay, this is probably my own #1 fear, that of being rejected. And I'm a bit surprised by this, I have to say, as I'm not entirely sure what 'rejection' I'm afraid of. I think it's about wanting the acceptance and love of others and making sure that you don't do anything to jeopardise that.
Maybe. I actually don't know, so need to do more on this fear. How about you?
9. FEAR OF SPIDERS
This is a self-explanatory fear - thankfully, one that I no longer suffer from. I spent 2 years living in Malawi, Africa and saw enough huge creepy-crawlies to finally lose my fear of Daddy Longlegs and their ilk. (I also lost my 'sweet tooth', but that's another story.)
I hate to say it, but fear of spiders is pretty much an irrational fear. And exposing yourself to this fear is what's required. So let's start now, with this image, below (yes, those 2 spiders do look a bit creepy, I admit!)...
Another so-called male fear, fear of commitment affects us all, I believe, at different stages of our lives. I also think - as with the other top 10 fears listed above - that we can suffer this fear in one part of our lives, and not in another.
So, I am happy to commit my financial future to this website - the one that you're on, SelfHelpCollective.com - whilst I am less keen to commit to someone in a romantic relationship. There are others who are quite happy getting married (again and again, sometimes) but would never risk doing what they loved professionally instead of earning a regular and reliable income in a dull job that is slowly 'killing' them.
going to be kind to myself and my fear of commitment. Well, today I am, anyway!
So, to summarise, that list of top 10 fears, again...
01. Fear of flying
02. Fear of public speaking
03. Fear of heights
04. Fear of the dark
05. Fear of intimacy
06. Fear of death
07. Fear of failure
08. Fear of rejection (my own #1)
09. Fear of spiders
10. Fear of commitment
And a great way to overcome these fears & phobias is to check out Hypnosis Downloads' Overcome Fears and Phobias page, as provided by the professional therapist trainers at HypnosisDownloads.com.
(You could also check out Hypnosis Downloads' Fear & Anxiety page.)
And now, a question you might be asking yourself as continue reading this page...
(1) How did I come up with this list of common fears in the first place?
Well, the short answer is explained above and this is the long one, if you're interested...
So, the SelfHelpCollective.com website was conceived, built and is hosted (and supported) by my using a software service called Solo Build It! or SBI!. (And you can read about why I think SBI! is a perfect self-improvement tool here!) And SBI! comes with an impressive keyword research tool with the fabulous name of Brainstorm It! (think market research on what people actually search for, and you won't be far wrong). And so I used this keyword research tool to determine the top 10 searches for 'fear of'-type searches.
So, in effect, my top 10 list of fears represents the top 10 fear-related searches at search engines like Google.
I guess I could have done a poll (or borrowed the data from an existing poll - see below); I could have checked other top 10 fear sites - but I decided to use my own keyword research instead.
Okay, enough about all that! I'm sure some people were interested so I explained...