My Low Self Esteem Signs
I am regularly on the verge of tears. I feel hopeless and helpless almost constantly, and often tell myself what I am doing wrong, what the challenges or problems are that I can't solve (or don't know what to do about) through lack of skills/ experience/ confidence.
Work often triggers my stress and anxiety because I am constantly confronted with situations I don't know how to handle, and I've realised it's because I tell myself that I'm not good enough and get really angry with myself.
This is especially true since my predecessor at work was a strong leader, highly respected and loved by all who knew her, I constantly compare myself to her as a means of reinforcing my feelings that I'm hopeless and helpless.
I get frustrated about beating myself up over my mistakes but struggle to change my whole attitude around. My friends and family all seem to have their own problems and struggle with depression, so I feel unable to share my problems and add to their burden, especially my nearest and dearest, who has been suicidal in recent years.
While I've been struggling for many years to feel good about myself, the last 2 years have been the worst, where I am so overwhelmed by anxiety and depression so regularly that every week I break down in tears and withdraw from the people around me out of shame at being so out of control.
Thank you so much for sharing your symptoms of low self-esteem with us. It is good for you and us both that you are able to at least share some of your feelings and experiences here at SelfHelpCollective.com - thank you.
Being able to share feelings is so important, especially when so many of us believe that we have no-one who wants to listen. That is why UK-based The Samaritans, for example, came into existing in the 1950s - to offer judgment-free, confidential listening, with the aim to reduce suicides. (And I believe this page offers wise advice when it comes to those that are thinking about suicide...)
Your story, Anon, is not about suicide though, but about feelings of low self-worth that you are unable to share and explore safely with anyone other than yourself. So, again, I thank you for being brave enough to share here...