SelfHelpCollective.com

My Addiction Story

by Christie
(Hilton Head, SC, USA)

This is a story of what happens when you don't respond well when very bad things happen to you. This is a story of how stories repeat. This is a story of how you can change your story, too, how you can slowly, but surely make different choices...

(STORY THEME: Perseverance/Faith)

How To Rebuild Your Life When You Lose Everything

I became addicted to drugs after my husband passed away in a car accident. Within a short span of time I lost everything and everyone that I ever loved. I lost both my houses, car, custody of my beloved boys - but I could not see what was happening to me at the time. I ended up living in a single wide, rat infested, trailer that was constantly raided by the police. Many of the people I knew from that time either died or are imprisoned.

It was only divine intervention that helped set me on the right path. I had a boyfriend that I lived with for 2 years who helped me stay straight, and a job I loved. But I had a suspended drivers license and ruined credit.

Two years ago my boss died from a heart attack then my boyfriend died in a car accident 8 days later. I began slowly spiraling downward again. This time I could see what was happening and decided to move to Charleston, SC back near my boys to rebuild our relationship. I was lonely and alone: I didn't have anyone for support and had trouble finding employment since I didn't have a drivers license and I had some problems with my background check.

I took a job selling cars at the same time I befriended a drug addict friend. Within a few weeks I was back using hard drugs until one night, driving recklessly I was pulled over and arrested where I spent 60-days in the detention center.

When I was released I found myself with nothing. My car had been impounded with my wallet, phone, clothes, computer etc and I didn't have a cent to my name. Discouraged, I went right back to using drugs. Within three weeks I decided I would rather die than continue on like that and went into detox.

When I got out I moved in with a friend who drank vodka non-stop which turned him into a rageaholic. Fearing for my life after a terrible night I moved in with the downstairs neightbors in the apartments where I was living. I was living with two guys I barely knew with no job, no way around no money and no anything.

I began walking to two AA meetings each day where I slowly made friends. I met women who were living in a recovery house and moved in that house with 5-other women all recently sober. Every day was drama of some sort. I would wake up and dress in what few clothes I had, then take the bus downtown where I worked a job I barely understood selling timeshare for minimum wage. I was depressed beyond belief.

My recovery roommates went through my personal stuff whenever they felt like it and discovered I was taking Suboxone which is designed to help addicts get off pain pills permanently. They kicked me out of the house giving me 15-minutes to pack my stuff and move.

One of my co-workers had a daughter starting an externship in nearby Hilton Head and we agreed to move. I began a job with another timeshare company which took 3-4 months to even grasp what we are selling. I was dead broke and didn't know anyone.

Sometime in June as my relationship with God strengthened the cloud of depression hanging over my head finally lifted and I began making enough money to become self supportive. I really began changing around December growing closer to God and spending my free time writing my book I am working on and feeling productive. I finally have my drivers license back for the first time in 5-years and a car that is registered legally in my name.

Things have definitely come a long way in just 18-months of time and I want to say to anyone suffering through addiction: if I can make it from borderline homeless and back in just a year and a half so can you.

There is always hope...