"Stories" from the Collective (YOU)


Self-Esteem and Relationships

by Amanda Collins
(Goodlettsville TN, USA)


I love my boyfriend and the great connection we have, but I hate my low self esteem and how it makes me behave in the relationship. I'm just so jealous. Of everything. Can someone who's been through this help me, please...

"Your Relationship Questions, Your Answers!"

QUESTION: How To Stop Being Jealous?


MORE FROM Amanda...

I have been living with my boyfriend for over 2 years now.

We have one awesome connection.

The only problem is......me.

I have the worst selfesteem ever, and I know that's my issue. But fixing it is so hard. I'm pushing him away. He swears he'd never leave me, that he loves me.

My jealously is out of control. We don't watch movies, we don't swim. Hell we hardly do anything.

I just want to get over this.

I become physically sick in certain situations.

The more I do this to him the more I hate myself, the more I hate myself the more I do it... a nasty cycle.

I would love to talk with someone who has been through this but has beaten it.... thank you.







STEVE'S ANSWER

"You gain strength, courage and confidence by every experience in which you really stop to look fear in the face."
-- Eleanor Roosevelt

Thanks for sharing your question here! It takes a lot of courage to do that, especially when the issues, as you see them, are about you; i.e. your low-self-esteem.

I'm going to let others share their views here, let someone who has 'beaten it', as you say, offer help.

But I would like to offer this thought to you: you can't love, properly, without it feeling risky, and even if you do love fully there are no guarantees of success!

Everyone that loves takes this risk - some are more comfortable feeling this risk than others.

I wish you well, Amanda, and thanks again

Steve

PS By the way, everyone suffers from low self esteem, at some point, just as everyone benefits from a healthy self-esteem sometimes, too. The people that seem most okay, most confident in life, are those people that don't take their low feelings too seriously.

I first started understanding this truth of the human experience after visiting Michael Neill's Supercoach website, and I highly recommend ALL take a look - it really is a place where miracles can happen!

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