Self respect - what Helen R Williams has to say...
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Self respect - what Helen R Williams has to say... |
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Self Respect
"With self respect, we like ourselves because of who we are and not because of what we can or cannot do." That's what Helen R Williams says in her children-focussed article on this subject. Helen goes on to talk about learning to respect yourself, and the importance for all of us (especially children) to respect oneself. There are no answers in Helen's self-respect article just truths... You will also find links to more articles on these self esteem issues - also suitable to all. Building self respect - what I say...Helen is editor of Consisten Parenting Advice.com so her article on respect is aimed at parents and children. Still, it explains self-respect to us all - whether we are child, parent or simply an adult trying to make the most of ourselves in this life. Yes, Helens' advice on self-respect is useful to us all. Helen thinks that self respect comes from being around people who respect themselves, and I agree. She also says that it's having respect for others. So respecting yourself really is a win-win situation for all concerned. (And that's the kind of message we at the Self Help Collective like to spread! :-) ) Self-respect, for me, is a little bit like self-confidence: you can decide to switch it on, or leave it switched off. If you respect yourself then others will start to respect you - they really will. This is not a chicken and egg situation: you must respect yourself before others will respect you! That's what I say - what do you say about the important issue of self respect? I would also say that having this is tied in very closely with having elf-esteem and being less prone to guilt, shame and blame. I'll leave the rest to Helen... Self Respect - What Is It And How Do We Learn To Respect Ourselves?Self-respect - what Helen R Williams has to say...What is Self Respect? With self respect, we like ourselves because of who we are and not because of what we can or cannot do. It is to have pride and knowledge of one's own worth, to value one's self. To have due respect for oneself, one's character, and one's conduct. Respect is earned, not given. Those with self-respect are less prone to regret, blame, guilt, shame, and secretive behaviour. It is the cornerstone on which many other attributes are built such as honesty, confidence, and integrity. How do you learn to respect yourself? Children learn from individuals who have a high respect for themselves. The more children are around people who feel good about themselves, the more they can emulate this important truth. It is not about what we do but who we are. It is about feeling valued, just because we are people. Teaching children about self respect Children need to be taught right from the beginning that this is part of their personal armoury of positive attributes. We can help them to do so by naming it for them. For instance, when we see our child do a respectful act, either for himself or for another, we can highlight this for him in language by saying, "I noticed your self respect as you took such good care of yourself today". "You obviously have respect for yourself as you were able to say no to your friend so clearly". "Making the right decision will confirm your self respect". Self respect is the benchmark upon which our values and morals are shaped. It is important to teach our children to be true to themselves. How many of us know the rest of this quotation from Shakespeare's Hamlet, to thine own self be true? "To thine own self be true, and it must follow, as the night the day, thou canst not then be false to any man." It follows that self respect becomes seen as respect for others, for possessions, for animals, nature, in fact, respect for all of life. The importance of self respect If we find it difficult to love and cherish ourselves, we find it hard to love and cherish others. It follows that if we have no self respect it is difficult to respect others. These positive emotions such as self esteem, self confidence, and self respect are part of the whole sense of our self image. Having self respect allows us to be more accepting of others' differences, to see people as people regardless of culture, class or creed and to understand the golden rule, "Do to others as you would have them do to you". If we are 'topped up' emotionally, we are able to give out to others from the overflow. No self respect People with no self respect find it difficult to have respect for others, for property, boundaries, animals and for values and morals. If we have low self esteem and little respect for ourselves it follows that our presence around others tends to be filled with a need for attention. We 'need' others to fill our emotional vacuum and then we blame them when they leave us feeling unfilled. Only we ourselves are able to top up our emotional tanks. Others can help us to feel good about ourselves but unless we actually take it on board as a personal belief, actually make it our own, then we are left feeling empty. Quotes "Where did we ever get the crazy idea that in order to make children do better, first we have to make them feel worse? Think of the last time you felt humiliated or treated unfairly. Did you feel like cooperating or doing better?" -- Jane Nelson "If I despised myself, it would be no compensation if everyone saluted me, and if I respect myself, it does not trouble me if others hold me lightly." -- Max Nordau "If you want to be respected by others the great thing is to respect yourself. Only by that, only by self-respect will you compel others to respect you." -- Dostoyevsky "Respect for ourselves guides our morals; respect for others guides our manners." -- Laurence Sterne ---------------------------------------------------- I believe that being a consistent parent is both vitally important and totally necessary to ensure a happy family life. However, becoming a consistent parent is rather like trying to push water uphill if we are not consistent within our selves. This website addresses HOW to adopt a firm, clear, consistent parenting approach, while enabling you to enhance and increase your emotional well-being. Article Source: http://EzineArticles.com/?expert=Helen_R_Williams More articles...
More quotations...
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