Your self confidence journey begins here... Over to Elaine Sihera, and you!
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Your self confidence journey begins here... Over to Elaine Sihera, and you! |
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Self ConfidenceWhat is self-confidence and how do you go about getting more of it? Well, read on... Whether you have low self-confidence or you're just interested in building and improving your self confidence, you'll find it all here! Self-confidence tips, quotations, and even a self confidence email course or two. We'll start with a definition of self-confidence from WikiPedia and finish with one from personal empowerment author Elaine Sihera... As always please do get in touch! Self confidence a la WikiPediaThe definition of self confidence on WikiPedia goes something like this: "The socio-pyschological concept of self-confidence relates to self-assuredness in one's personal judgement, ability, power etc..." Hmm, a bit technical that, from WikiPedia. Okay, these paragraphs are easier to understand... "Signs of self-confidence: a pleasant demeanour, a cheerful outlook, a wide circle of friends, satisfaction with one's personal life "Source of self confidence: [...] true self confidence comes from an attitude where you "promise yourself, no matter how difficult the problem life throws at you, that you will try as hard as you can to help yourself." Okay, not bad I suppose - thanks, WikiPedia! Tell me, how do you define self-confidence or even low self-confidence - let us know! Self-confidence a la meWell, at the risk of sounding like I don't have my own ideas, I tend to agree with Elaine Sihera below, in her article called, "7 Attributes of the Truly Confident Person": self confidence is about self-love, self-belief, having fearlessness and, ultimately, feeling happy. The thing is, you know when you're feeling confident: cooking a favourite meal, or talking to old friends, and you know when you're not: when you're either doing something new, or when you're doing something that you've told yourself you can't do. (Yes, I do this all the time - don't you? Mingling in large groups, for example - I often feel uncomfortable and low in self confidence. :-( ) The thing is... having self-confidence is great! It's empowering to you and quite often to the person on the receiving end of it. So I really hope that this page will help in building your self confidence (or improving self-confidence), as it will help me, via the following resources: Do get in touch with your thoughts on confidence. The Self Help Collective is all about you, after all, and the wisdom of many! :-) I'll leave you in the more than capable hands of Elaine Sihera now. But first, a quotation on confidence... "Know your value. Confidence breeds success. Act
like the person you want
7 Attributes of the Truly Confident PersonSelf confidence - what Elaine Sihera has to say...A lot of people might believe they are confident, depending on how they feel on any given day. But confidence is not a fleeting thing that is here today and takes a holiday tomorrow. Confidence is all pervasive. It shows itself in every aspect of our lives: the way we view ourself, perceive our world, approach crises, the way we treat others, our readiness to exercise compassion and forgiveness, and, most important, the way we treat ourselves. True confidence is an incredible feeling because it has a few key attributes embedded in it, seven of them, in fact, which are the hallmarks of the truly confident person. You cannot say you are confident unless you score highly on each of those seven aspects. 1. Self Love This is the first crucial attribute. If you have no self-love, you have no confidence because this is at the heart of confidence: self-love and self-acceptance, which then decides our self-esteem. It is not possible to be happy and confident yet dislike our bodies or ourselves. Any lack of self-love is a prelude to misery and dissatisfaction with our lot. Happiness begins from within and when we love ourself and do no seek the approval of anyone, we are half-way to real contentment and the next key attribute, self-belief. 2. Self-Belief With self-love comes amazing self-belief in what is truly possible. The Universe is our limit, as we become unstoppable and fearless. People who think highly of themselves do not see barriers to achievements or obstacles in their paths. Anything which blocks their journey can be removed because confident people already believe they have the tools to remove those blocks. They can cope with crises too because they believe they can. That is the main difference between a confident and low confidence person: one believes they have the power to affect their life, whereas the other looks to others to do it for them. 3. Comfort in Themself Confident people are happy in their own skin. They love who they are, they do not wish to be anyone else and they seek no one's approval to be whom they wish to be. That is a sure sign of a strong sense of belonging and personal security. Even when there is a setback, they know it is only temporary and they will be back in action again because they value themself and their talents, regardless of what other people think. They tend to do what they please without following the fashion or being lemmings. Being natural leaders, they tend to set the pace for others and to inspire them. 4. Self-Awareness Confident people know their limitations and their potential. That is because they do not sit and dwell on their weaknesses, like people of low esteem. They identify their strengths and nurture them while acknowledging their weaknesses. But they are fully aware that the unique beings they are is the result of BOTH their strengths and weaknesses, so they do not dwell on the negative aspects of their personality. They know what makes them happy and sad. Being leaders and optimists, they are more assured in their direction and objectives because they understand who they are and what they want, which is the first key step to boosting achievement and personal development. 5. Fearlessness Confident people tend to be pioneers, fearless in their approach and their actions. It is not that they do not have the usual fears of survival. What they don't have is the limiting and paralysing fears regarding simply living their life to the utmost which plague insecure and non-confident people. Those with high self-esteem are keen to get on with it so they tend to act first and be afraid later! Willing to take risks and to make sacrifices, they have very little fear in living their life to the max. 6. Experiment Really confident people love to experiment, to try out new situations, innovate and create, They are always pushing the boundaries of their talents because of their self-belief. Unlike people of low esteem, confident ones do not care about making mistakes, because they know that's how they learn and grow. They are not worried about being wrong, but at arriving at a solution or a different result, no matter how many times they have to change their approach. They recognise that mistakes are part and parcel of success on their personal journey. Failure is not in their vocabulary and so they will achieve their desires no matter how long it takes, because they have the tenacity, self-belief and determination to keep trying even when many others have given up. 7. Happiness Confident people are truly happy with their life. It doesn't mean they are never sad. It means that if they are down it lasts very briefly and then they are back up again. They know they can always do something else and change the result. People of low esteem always blame themself and reinforce that with even poorer thoughts of their abilities, so they stay in the doldrums much longer. They are not truly at peace so they take the knocks badly. Confident people know that setbacks don't last long and all they need to do is brush themself off and start all over again, while keeping their eye on their goals. Above all, being contented with themselves and their bodies, confident people tend to be truly happy, often cheerful and with a ready smile. ---------------------------------------------------- ELAINE SIHERA is a Personal Empowerment, Relationships and Diversity Consultant. Author of: 10 Easy Steps to Growing Older Disgracefully; 10 Easy Steps to Finding Your Ideal Soulmate!; Money, Sex & Compromise and Managing the Diversity Maze, among others (available on http://www.amazon.co.uk as well as her personal website)
What do YOU think?Do tell us what you think about the issue of self confidence . Oh, and please rate this page - thanks. :-)
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