"Stories" from the Collective (YOU)


Overcoming Sexual Insecurity

by Karen
(NV, USA)

Help I feel insecure in sex, sometimes, but I think my boyfriend is not making it easy for me too, comparing me to his other lovers...

"Your Relationship Questions, Your Answers!"


QUESTION: How can I stop being insecure with my boyfriend and our sexual relationship?


MORE FROM Karen...

How can I stop being insecure with my boyfriend and our sexual relationship?

How can I stop comparing myself to other girls he has been with in the past?

Yesterday, we were talking about how I do not like a certain sexual position. He replied with, "I have had great missionary in the past".

This left me feeling insecure and inadequate.

I feel like I am overthinking, is that fair or am I letting my thoughts control me?


STEVE'S ANSWER

"Believe in yourself and all that you are. Know that there is something inside you that is greater than any obstacle."
-- Christian D. Larson


There are a couple of issues that come to my mind, straight away:

1) Sexual insecurity is quite common - amongst women AND men. It's just another form of insecurity, which is just another form of fear.

Take a look at this Google search to find further discussion of this topic: overcoming sexual security.

The point about a loving partner, though - and this is somewhat ideal, but still - is that they help you face your insecurities (which we all have!) rather than make them worse for you.

Which leads me to the second point.

2) It's not cool for your man to be comparing you to his other lovers. Okay, he's frustrated at your insecurities but this is not how to deal with it.


SOME SUGGESTED RESOURCES:

* Google Search

* Hypnosis Downloads on relationship insecurity

* Get Transformative Coaching on topic of insecurity (with me - first, introductory conversation free!)

(Anyone else got any suggestions? In particular, other women.)

Good luck, and thank you so much for opening yourself up like this, re your desire to overcome sexual insecurity - that step alone is part of the solution you're looking for...

Thanks,
Steve

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