"Stories" from the Collective (YOU)


Moving On From Boyfriend?

by Erin
(Edmonton, Canada)

I love my boyfriend and he loves me, a lot. But I can't help thinking that I'd like to date other guys, like to experience being single - he's my first and only boyfriend. I'm confused, and not sure what to do...

"Relationships Q&A with You, Me and Paula Renaye"

QUESTION: Should I Stay Or Should I Go?...


MORE FROM Erin...

My boyfriend and I have been dating for almost 3 years and are now living together. He was my first boyfriend and we started dating in high school. I am in my second year of university while he is working a full time job.


Since we moved in together I have begun to doubt our relationship. There are days where everything is golden and days where I can only see the things I don't like about him (stubbornness, irresponsibility, laziness). He is crazy about me and likes to talk about getting engaged and part of me really wants that but another part wants me to experience dating other guys and generally being single.

Part of why I don't want to leave is because I know that I am his main motivator and I don't think he'd fare well without me.


I broke up with him briefly but went back (partially because I missed him, partially because he was a wreck) but I'm afraid of judgement if I try again and go back.

So the question is: Should I leave and leave him to his fate or should I wade it out and wait for both of us to mature?...







STEVE'S ANSWER

"Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end."
-- Seneca

You have summed up the essential difficulty in moving on in a relationship. The fact it's your first relationship only makes this decision harder.

What should you do?

Leave or stay together - only YOU know what's right for you and your life.

I will only say this, though: you WILL have to make some kind of decision at some point
  • Leave him, hurt his feelings, but live your life

  • Stay with him, renew your love, and forget the single life and other guys

Life will not let you be indecisive about this, it just won't.

Good luck making the right decision for you, Erin! Remember, and we all deep down know this to be true, you're not responsible for other people's feelings - just your own

Steve


NOTE: I've created a relationships ebook called "Top 10 Relationship Questions... Answered" that aims to help anyone in a romantic relationship - whether it's to start/end a relationship, or to learn how to trust in a relationship, or even how to deal with a controlling relationship.

And the answers in the ebook I provide (based on questions asked in the Relationship Advice Forum) help you find your answers, in your own unique relationships. I recommend it, but then I would say that wouldn't I! Find out more here...

Steve
(Dec 1st, 2015)

 

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