"Stories" from the Collective (YOU)


His Lying Is Breaking Us Up

by Lacy
(NC, USA)

My boyfriend lies to me about his drinking. All I want him to do is stop lying, rather than stop drinking, but now he feels pressured by me so much so that he seems to want to end the relationship...

"Relationships Q&A with You, Me and Paula Renaye"

QUESTION: My 4 Year Relationship Ends Suddenly - Plese Help!...


MORE FROM Lacy...

My 4 year relationship ends suddenly! So here the background story...

I've been dating my boyfriend for four years and we've had our ups, downs, and arguments like all couples but never anything too serious. Our biggest problem was that my boyfriend has lied to me several times throughout our relationship over drinking.

Now, my boyfriend is no alcoholic or anything but these lies included a party busted up by the cops, drunk driving, and him getting seriously hung over.

So every time after I would find out about these lies I would confront him and attempt to come up with a solution to stop him from lying to me. He never did. I found out that he lied to me a month or so ago and it led to a serious argument.

All I asked of him was that he stop lying and to send me a text saying that he was going to drink whenever he does. Anyways, that's our one big problem.

So within the past few weeks my boyfriend has been having trouble sleeping and wasn't eating much. He would say things to me like that he was so unhappy and that he hated life. I asked why and he said he didn't know and that it had to do with him about to graduate college, start a new terrific job, and move away alone until I graduated a year later and joined him.

He also found out that his grandfather only has 3 to 8 months to live due to cancer. I asked him if I had anything to do with him being upset and he would say no.

So I've just been trying to be supportive but while he was visiting his grandfather with his family he texted me saying that he was really unhappy. I asked why and he said that it was because of me and that he's been unhappy for a long time. He was very vague in his reasoning but the reasons that he did give me were things that resulted due to his lying and my lack of trust in him to tell the truth.

I love him so much and I begged him to give us another chance and that I would change and do what he needed me to make him happy again but he just kept saying that he couldn't do it anymore and that he needed a break to reevaluate our relationship and hung up on me.

I sent him one last text telling him how much I loved him and how sorry I am that I made him unhappy and he hasn't responded.

I don't understand where this all come from. We've been talking about getting married and yesterday he even said that he guaranteed that if we had kids that they would have brown eyes.

I had my whole life planned out with him and everyone expected us to get married. I don't know if during this break whether he will decide that he wants to be with me or not.



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