Common New Year Resolutions #5: Find Soulmate
"Love, love me do..."
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- This isn't just a famous Beatles song, it's the wailing call of many over Christmas and New Year, when they realise that they're going to be spending yet more holiday time alone, or spend it with someone they'd rather not be with.
- Love, or being with someone special, is a great thing to want to add to your life, it really is. Trouble is, it's also a very challenging pastime as 'the man of your dreams' is a real person, with real strengths/weaknesses. And so it goes for that fantasy woman you've been holding out for, too...
Aye, despite you're good intentions, this is yet another new year resolution you're going to be able to sabotage quite easily (oh yes it its!)...
New year resolutions 05:
"I'm going to FIND MY SOULMATE..."
"There is more hunger for love and
in this world than for bread."
But first, here's links to 2 resources that can help you DO your resolutions this year (for a change)
- Information on what's holding you back (self-sabotage)
- Self-hypnosis & keeping new year resolutions
Top 10 New Year Resolutions - 05: Find Soulmate
Common new year resolutions - what YOU REALLY say...
Find your soulmate? Ho, ho, ho, ho, ho, to quote a popular character at Christmas time. And here's another expression British pantomime lovers hear at this time of year, too, especially when it comes to people and their common new year resolutions..."OH - NO - YOU'RE - NOT!..."
(And if someone clever also shouts, "Behind you!", don't dismiss it for nonsense. This pantomine expression really means, in this instance - bit deep and meaningful, this - "look inside you". Unless it's just easier blaming others...)
INSTEAD, you're going to do the following with this new year resolution:
- You're going to join an internet dating site like Guardian Soulmates or Match.com, or even PlentyOfFish.com, and you're going to spend lots and lots and lots of time messaging, and flirting and 'hanging out' online. Why, you might even go on a few dates...
But there'll always be something 'wrong' with the people you meet - they won't quite tick all the (Prince Charming) boxes, she won't quite have the (Ms Right curvaceous) credentials. Or something. Anything. Anything to stop you having a real relationship with a real person involving real risk.
- You're NOT going to join an internet dating site, go speed dating, join a new club or go on a new adult learning course. And why not? Weellll, you don't really have the time (do you?) and you only ever meet sad weirdos or people who are all already coupled up (don't you?)
No? Have I got you all wrong here. Hey, prove me wrong, prove me wrong...
Yes, if you ARE serious - because this new year IS going be different (yeah, right!) - then can I politely suggest that you check out the following resources:
- Read about the issue of fear of commitment.
And you could also check out fear of intimacy, fear of failure and fear of rejection - because when you find someone to love, you better believe that these 'ugly fears' are going to rear their ugly fear head. But that's okay, because - as Susan Jeffries, and almost anyone who's ever touched a drop of the ol' self help soothin' knows - it's all about feeling the fear and doing it anyway! Ain't it!
- Consider this advice: LEARN MORE - yes, learn more about the art of dating from a dating coaches that prize integrity alongside fulfilling the desire we have inside of us to meet a high-quality partner. I'm talking about Scott & Emily McKay's DeserveWhatYouWant.com - free and paid for training resources that I highly recommend (aimed at men, but there are resources for women, too).
More common resolutions...