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Anger Management

What has anger management got to do with self-help?

Y'know, if another person asks me that I swear my blood will boil it really will!...

Ha ha. Actually, it is a good question and one I considered carefully as I researched this website. Anger is such a harsh, stern word after all, and most of the other topics covered at The Self Help Collective seem positive and upbeat.

Well... the simple fact is, if you're angry (and you spend a lot of your time being angry) then you're not happy! Not that there's anything wrong with anger, or being angry - annoying stuff happens to all of us, after all - but your anger does need to be managed. And hopefully this anger management page will at least point you in the right direction, and you might have the odd giggle too. (Have you checked out these amusing Anger Management Movie YouTube videos, for example?)

"Don't make me angry! You wouldn't like me when I'm angry"

Anger Management

Anger Management - what I say...

When it comes to anger management, I can't help thinking (as you'll soon see) about the Buddha's thoughts. He said some wise stuff in his time, but this really hits home for me...

"Holding onto anger is like grasping onto a hot coal
with the intent of throwing it at someone else.
You are the one who gets burned." -- Buddha

I know, for example, that I don't do anger very well. I don't express my anger at the right time and in the right place - I let it stew. For years and years and years. (Ah, the joy of siblings!) And then I'm on the look out for the first thing 'wrong' that that person does to me and blammo! - a mountain out of a molehill, an ugly scene, tears etc.

Ugly, ugly, ugly and so easily avoidable... with anger management.

So I know that it is me that suffers with this unexpressed anger and I am working on it (should you be concerned ;-) ). But I bet I'm not the only one with such a problem. (This (fictional) man has anger issues, for example, though you may not appreciate it on this witty(?) page about the Buddha and his quotations.)

Yes, we probably all have anger management problems and could all probably benefit from some anger management tips from time to time.

So how do we manage our anger, then?

As ever, the first step in solving the problem is recognising that we have one. (Check out this anger management toolkit to measure your anger, why don't you!)

For example, at first glance I know that I don't have any anger problems and I can't imagine myself ever attending one of those anger management classes. I rarely get angry. I'm actually quite a calm and steady person. However I also know that I do suffer from road rage (and I hardly ever drive) and I also know that whenever I do get angry it stays with me for a very long time.

So just not getting angry does not mean you don't have anger management problems.

And just because the people you know deal with your odd moodiness, doesn't mean that you don't have a problem.

And then there are the obvious 'exploding head' candidates that you just want to run away from, fast!

(Of course it is possible that you don't get angry and that you don't have anger problems. In that case would you mind please sharing your anger management tips with us? :-) Contact us here!)

So, you recognise the problem with your angriness and then you take the appropriate action. That could mean doing one of the following:

• Going on an anger management class
• Reading (and putting into action) one of these anger management tips
• Buying a book on anger management
• Talking about your anger with your therapist, friend or even your partner
• etc.

Problem-solving, whatever the problem, is not rocket science! Just recognise the problem, identify the solution, and put that solution into practice.

And the Self Help Collective isn't hear to provide you with all the answers (any answers, even) as the answer lies within you.

So I'll say no more for now about anger management. Of course I welcome your (more or less expert) opinions on the subject - just fill in the contact us form!

And I'll leave you with this pithy quote from the film, Anger Management:

"Remember, Lou, temper's the one thing you can't get rid of by losing it"

Oh! One last thing, you can learn more about anger and it's management from these anger management articles. Enjoy! (And if you don't enjoy, please don't get cross with me, eh! ;-) )

What do YOU think?

Do tell us what you think about the issue of anger management . Oh, and please rate this page - thanks. :-)